Not all mushrooms make you do the Mario...

I figured I would start off with a story from my youth.

When I was about four, I was playing in the yard of my home. Poking at the mushrooms growing in the grass. My brother, who was sitting on our tree swing at the time, saw this and decided to try to kill his naive younger brother. He looked to me with a smile and announced that if I were to eat one of the mushrooms that I would in turn grow, much the same as Mario does when he eats a red speckled mushroom.

With powerful information like that I decided to not pass such an epic opportunity. Devouring one of these mushrooms would give me the power to stomp all obstacles in my way but three, three would turn me into a beast feared the world round. So I ate them. Three of the tiny little mushrooms growing in my yard. Then I went inside to tell my parents of my grand achievements.


My mother did not seem nearly as amused as I was flustered and disturbed they asked my brother if what I had told them was true. He verified, but made sure that they knew it was of my own devices and he had no part in the decision making process. My mother told my father to go to the local store to pick up something. What he came back with was clearly one of the most amazing liquids this world has ever seen. Syrup of ipecac. They handed me a glass of water and administered the treatment via a dropper. In no time I was heaving, for what seemed like hours.

The odd part during all of this was, I was not in the least disturbed by any of my induced vomiting. I was actually laughing. I was elated for no apparent reason. Vomiting and laughing, I couldn't manage to do both at the same time, but during my breaks it would just get louder and louder.

Imagine seeing your own child curled over the toilet, laughing and vomiting all the while. I'm sure it was mildly traumatizing for them. But for me, it was better then crack. Looking back on such a strange thing, I still have fond memories. Typically you say, we will laugh about this later, but for some unknown reason I was laughing then.